It was December of 2020. The first Christmas we would all experience during the Covid-19 pandemic was approaching. My best friend of twenty-five years, Kelly, had moved in with me earlier in the year. She had been teaching art in Quito, Ecuador for the past 3 years, but was forced to make a final decision to come back to America or stay indefinitely in Ecuador as flights would stop. She chose to come home. Instead of moving back in with her father, she moved in with me. I had left my career the month prior. My experience of Covid made me realize I was putting my time and energy into a job I no longer had passion for. I was toying with the idea of going back to school for my master’s and becoming a counselor. I was doing Uber Eats to keep myself afloat. I drove around listening to NPR all day while I delivered sushi and Starbuck’s to people’s homes. Kelly was able to get a gig homeschooling two children for minimum pay. It was a difficult time, but we were looking forward to Christmas with our families.
The week of Christmas arrived. On the 22nd, my mom called to tell me that she had Covid and that my family would have to quarantine. I was devastated. However, Kelly’s family is also my family. So, I resigned to go their home for Christmas. On the 24th, Kelly’s sister called to say that their family had also tested positive for Covid. Unfortunately, the rest of Kelly’s extended family had already arrived at her sister’s house a few days earlier for the holiday. Kelly’s family would also be quarantining. So, here we were, two thirty-year-old women, without significant others, children, or a family to celebrate Christmas with. I would miss my mom’s broccoli casserole and playing boardgames with my family. Kelly would miss the opportunity to play Santa for her nieces and nephews. We had each other, that was it. How would we spend Christmas?
On Christmas Eve, trying to figure out how to celebrate, Kelly reminded me of our long-time friend Elijah. Elijah, whose father had passed from Covid earlier in the year. Elijah, who had recently reseparated from the mother of his daughter and was now going through a custody battle. We reached out to Elijah to celebrate with us, but he stated he would pass. Elijah, who was always down to get down, wanted to be alone for Christmas. It didn’t sit well with us. So, we decided to bring Christmas to him.
On Christmas morning, Kelly made her aunt’s famous baked brie with jam. It is literally brie baked in an oven with date jam on top. Simple, but sinful. Kelly dressed up as Santa, and I, as an elf using what we had in our combined closets. We brought our cheese, a loaf of French bread, a few bottles of wine, and drove unannounced to Elijah’s house around one in the afternoon. When we arrived, we rang the doorbell and started singing, “Jingle Bells”. When Elijah opened the door, the look on his face was priceless. He started crying. We started crying. We all started laughing together. Elijah invited us inside and we proceeded to have a very merry Christmas. We ate a ton of cheese. We made little music videos together and sent them to all our families and friends. We talked about everything we had gone through over the past year. We were Christmas misfits, but we made the best of it.
Things don’t always go according to plan, especially around the holidays. Family drama, loss, and struggle is often highlighted during the holidays. Sometimes there can be an immense amount of pressure to do things a certain way because that is the way things have always been done. My Christmas wish for you is that you enjoy your holiday, no matter what is going on in your life. You may not be able to have a traditional Christmas dinner, you may not have presents to give, and you may not always get to spend it with the people you planned to. For just that day, give yourself a break. Allow yourself to celebrate regardless. The Christmas when nothing went according to plan for me was the most memorable Christmas of my life.
If you would like to speak to a professional counselor or psychologist about this and are in the Chicago area, please feel free to contact Olive Branch Counseling Associates, Inc. at 708-633-8000. We are located at 6819 West 167th Street in Tinley Park, Illinois 60477.
Hillary R.,
Masters Level Intern, 2023
CounselingMatters.live 
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