Have You Really Tried It All?

There are areas in our lives where we are simply going in circles bumping into the same wall every time. We have tried and tried but end up in the same pattern or with the same outcome. However, I recognize it can be difficult to accept these facts as we do not like to demonstrate when we are defeated or stuck in a cycle. Therefore, if you find yourself struggling to talk about your habits and patterns that have led you nowhere, I will share some of mine. 

       I have experienced moments where I have been blocked or stuck. I care to mention this because many times, we want to be better, but do not see results. Why is that? Let me explain. There have been times in my life where I have said I’ve tried, but in reality, I only “kind of tried.” This can apply to certain responsibilities, goals, sports, school such as trying to pass that math class or be in the varsity soccer team. I was recently in a scenario where I knew I should reach out to a person, but I was afraid to do so because I did not want to see the result of that call, however, I tried calling this person through the phone. The reality of this situation, though, is I did not want the person to pick up the phone so when they did not respond to my phone call, I automatically took that as a sign that I should not continue pursuing the person but rather settled with “trying” to reach out. The question becomes, though, did I really try?

      Many times, in our lives we convince ourselves that we have tried everything and there was no result, but in reality, when we truly try, there is never a definite ending to trying. In other words, there are times in our lives when we say we have tried it all, yet we have not really tried. For example, seeing the juicy burger commercial on your TV screen does not mean you just tried the burger or took a bite of it. I came to realize that when someone is truly resilient in reaching their goals, there will never be an end to trying. When we say, “there’s no hope, I have tried it all,” in reality, we are setting a limitation to what could be done. However, persistence has no end, except, we set our own limits. Therefore, we enter this cycle of being inspired to do something, so we try it out, yet we become tired or see no results at the moment, therefore, we become comfortable with where we are standing rather than pursuing where we wanted to be. To be realistic, this is a common concept for new year resolutions where everyone wants to start an exercise journey, but two weeks later quit and say, “at least I tried,” but did you really try? 

      When we genuinely try, we do not give up or set limitations for ourselves. I would say, however, my hope after you read this is not for you to think you are not trying hard enough or at all, but rather finding a way where there seems to be no way. Never stop trying; You have the power to make the way for yourself. One of my good friends once told me “It’s a different kind of tired when you truly try something,” but why is that? This is due to putting in all the effort to reach the goal. Sometimes this will cause you to sacrifice certain things in your life that are a distraction or letting go of certain people that have not produced healthy fruits in you. 

      Therefore, the next time you feel weak or lack motivation, ask yourself if you have tried enough. I encourage you to not let your own limitations or the limitations of society upon you define you, but rather find a way, as long as it is safe and healthy. You are closer to your goal than you think. Do not give up on yourself or your journey. Be motivated and you will see results that will make the journey and trials worth it. 

Written by : Rachel Garcia; Masters Level Intern at Olive Branch

If you need support, live in the Chicago area, and would like to speak to a professional counselor, please contact Olive Branch Counseling Associates, Inc. at 708-633-8000. We are located at 6819 West 167th Street in Tinley Park, Illinois 60477.