Parasocial Relationships

I don’t know how your media algorithm works, but if you are exposed to anything like what I am exposed to, you’ve probably heard a lot about Taylor Swift in these last few weeks. Between her tour and her love life, it seems the news can’t get enough of her! Beyond headlines, spending time on social media apps like Instagram and Tiktok will provide insight into how her fans feel about all her rumored relationships and other goings-on. From what I’ve seen as a young person and fan of Swift’s, many “Swifties,” as her fans are called, are disappointed in her actions. I’ve seen multiple videos of people in tears over her relationship with lead “The 1975” singer, Matty Healy, and I wonder why it hurts them so bad.

A term being thrown around in this conversation surrounding the strong connections fans feel to Swift has been “parasocial relationships.” In my experience with it, it’s been used so often that it’s taken on an evil connotation. Users of the term throw it around as though it’s foolish, shallow, and shameful to have. Unqualified people seem to have an affinity for diagnosing other people and situations online, so it’s important to really dive into the meaning of psychological terms that become trendy.

Essentially, a parasocial relationship is a one-sided relationship, in which one party extends effort and the other doesn’t know the former exists. The term was first coined back in 1956, but the popularity of the concept was expedited due to COVID-19, in which nearly every relationship was moved to an online format. In doing so, it was harder to draw the line between friends and family interactions online, and celebrity interactions online. Through this, fans of celebrities were able to more easily feel as though they knew them, and feel the celebrities’ highs and lows as their own on occasion.

That sounds pretty intense. When riding the emotional roller coaster of a celebrity happens, that’s not a great thing. Projecting your own morals onto someone you don’t know and then being disappointed when they inevitably fall short makes for a pretty unhealthy relationship. On the other hand, parasocial relationships can be positive things.

Through a parasocial relationship, a person can experience an array of benefits. For one, a celebrity may inspire them. Being so exposed to someone’s success and details of their upbringing can motivate people to engage in similar actions. A parasocial relationship may also provide a safe space for a fan that may not otherwise have one. I know a few people who have made online friends by participating in fanbase discourse. Socializing online may also serve as a good “trial run” for those who are more timid to do so in real life. They can build confidence in online interactions before moving onto bigger things.

It’s certainly important to be wary when developing a parasocial relationship. While it has its benefits and those are not to be negated, it’s also important to know when to take a step back. If your loved ones are concerned about a relationship you may have with a celebrity, it’s probably best to listen to them. As long as you aren’t hurting yourself or the celebrity you’re drawn to, parasocial relationships may not be the villains that online discourse makes them out to be.

Lucy M.

Undergraduate Intern 2023

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References

Lawler, Moira. “What Are Parasocial Relationships – and Are They Healthy?” EverydayHealth.Com, 17 Feb. 2023, http://www.everydayhealth.com/emotional-health/what-are-parasocial-relationships-and-are-they-healthy/#:~:text=What%20Is%20a%20Parasocial%20Relationship,Register%20of%20Health%20Services%20Psychologists.