Last year around this time, I was exhausted in every possible way one can be exhausted. Emotionally, mentally, physically, socially, even spiritually, I was exhausted. That semester of grad school was a doozy. I was preparing materials for internship applications and researching internship sites. I had fifteen-page papers due. I had presentations due. I was working full time. I was trying to maintain my social life as best I could. I was trying to be a good girlfriend. What I didn’t do was take time for myself.
When December began, I had no energy to decorate that year. I decided to skip decorating all together. I shrugged it off and thought I would save time that way. I argued with myself that I was saving myself the additional task of taking everything down as well. I thought, “What difference does it really make?”. I repeated over and over to myself that I just didn’t have the time. My boyfriend was upset and concerned, “You really aren’t going to decorate at all?”. He was right to be concerned. Christmas is my favorite holiday. Years prior I would start decorating around Thanksgiving and have been known for leaving décor up until the middle or end of March. If there is snow, my Christmas décor is warranted! I had all kinds of different Christmas playlists. I had forced my boyfriend to do a Christmas movie marathon with me the year before, introducing him to “A Christmas Story” and “It’s a Wonderful Life”. I usually have multiple advent calendars of various themes. I love the magic of Christmas.
However, last year, I wasn’t feeling magical. I was tired. My boyfriend proceeded to decorate the outside of the house. It was pretty, but I just wasn’t in the Christmas spirit. I didn’t watch any Christmas movies. I didn’t send any Christmas cards. And I didn’t even buy a box of “Santa’s Favorites”, anise flavored cookies. The magic of the season had eluded me, I never invited it in. Bah humbug!
It was perhaps not until Spring came, when the snow had melted, and my stress levels had leveled out, that I realized what I had missed out on. I chose to not participate in holiday traditions that were meaningful to me. I opted out of doing the things that brought me joy and remind me of Christmases past. I was so wrapped up in work and my own stress that I overlooked the possibility that putting up my decorations and watching a few Christmas movies might make me feel better. I will never get that Christmas season back, but I learned something important from that experience. Traditions are powerful. They can be healing in a way. They elicit memories that connect us with our past selves and with those that are no longer here. Traditions carry meaning far greater than what we may realize, and they help us to remember who we really are and where we came from. Never underestimate the importance of holiday traditions.
If you would like to speak to a professional counselor or psychologist about this and are in the Chicago area, please feel free to contact Olive Branch Counseling Associates, Inc. at 708-633-8000. We are located at 6819 West 167th Street in Tinley Park, Illinois 60477.
Hillary R.,
Masters Level Intern, 2023
CounselingMatters.live 
Leave a comment